I'm making an attempt to organize all my various writing in hardcopy form, but hopefully I can get back to some of my "greatest hits" as was the concept. Anyway...I found this, and I had to share. I'm very thankful I made such "bad" choices. I love being able to see how God was working in everything the whole time.
March 20, 2004
How I gave up privacy because I honestly just can't keep anything about myself to, well, myself.
Well, I took this blog down because the lack of anonymity seemed to limit my conversation, but then just couldn't get into the whole online diary thing. So, I'm back. I actually decided to put this back up when I realized that one of my old entries was actually helping me with a decision I needed to make.
It's funny how things just fall into place sometimes. Of course, even after I've seen how things can work out, I'm prone to worry that every new time things fall into place it's going to be the time it back fires on me. Anyway, what I'm getting at is that I'll be done with classes in June, my lease is up in July, and I graduate in August. That means there are decisions to be made. The big decision is where do I go in July. It's very sad how we allow ourselves to be swayed by others when we are making decisions in our own life. Bottom line is that I've really wanted to move back to PC to spend time with my family and friends. Tallahassee has proved a veritable black hole in the social scene of someone whose idea of a good time does not consist of drunken puking, and it has left me yearning for people who at least try to understand me. So what has been the big deciding factor for not moving to PC? I'd love to tell you that it's my career, but the truth is I'm not that set in my career decision. I'd love to teach. I'd love to edit. I'd love to play with office supplies all day. I'd love to make a lot of money, but I'd rather avoid high stress, be happy, and do something I actually feel good about. (Whoops, I went off on a tangent.) Anyway, the big factor has been other people's opinions - not only of moving home for a while, but also choosing to teach for a while. Who said that whatever you do after you graduate is the last thing you can do? Hopefully, I've got a long life ahead of me, and I hate to think that I can never do anything else or live anywhere else.
If you are still with me, you are probably wondering where I'm going with this. If everything goes well, I have the opportunity to move home and live cheap for a while, pay off my student loans, try my wings at whatever comes my way, and have some time to make decisions in my life. And I think I'm going to take it. So, the moral of the story is...do what you want and tell everybody else where they can put their opinions on your life!